Why is this still an issue?

You know, I've been following the various personalities from the right commenting on the death of Sen. Kennedy, and I just wanted to make sure that I was able to voice my support:

May God have mercy on this brutish, evil man. How could anyone possibly bring themselves to respect a man who was a driving force behind such insidiously liberal agendas like forcing honest American businessmen to pay their ingracious workers adequate wages. Thank God Almighty that we’ve been able to slow that down, those working class people might be able to afford something besides Wal-Mart and McDonalds if they were paid more. For Jesus’s sake people, they might be able to afford cocaine, or healthcare!

Oh, and speaking of healthcare, there’s another thing Kennedy almost ruined! I mean, if he’d had his way back in the 60’s, and again in the 90’s, we’d be on Communist Health Care! It would have destroyed our country if we even came close to that; after all, to pay for such a thing, we’d either have to stop going to war so often, or maybe raise taxes! How can they raise taxes a few percent, when we have so little left after using 20-40% of our income to pay our good capitalist American health insurance companies. That evil man from Massachusetts obviously didn’t understand the American people. I am so glad he’s dead.

He was such a hateful bigot that he used the entire federal government to target blacks and other minorities under the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the even more radical Voting Rights Act Amendments of 1982! How could any but the most evil of men support such a thing? If he'd only been like Strom Thurmond or Trent Lott, both of whom knew that the best way to ensure racial equality was to separate ethnic groups, so they wouldn't fight or anything.

And of course, since he never did anything good with his life, we need to focus on his brutal, completely purposeful slaying of someone we wouldn't give a hoot about (and would probably vilify if she was alive, due to her associating with such an arch-socialist), except that she was killed by a liberal, and thus we need to talk about her constantly, 40 years later.

You silly liberals, how can you say he's so great? How can you call him a hero when he was born into the most privileged family in the nation? While most sons of rich families were doing good wholesome things like spreading their parent’s wealth around (like the Gipper would have wanted) by buying American boats and eventually losing their parent’s fortunes to good honest American loan sharks, he and his brothers were associating with evil communists, like that race-baiting “Reverend” Martin Luther Jr. (who couldn’t have had a Doctorate, they don’t give them to commies. Unless, of course those pinkos want to become latte-sipping, elitist professors) and we all know that “Reverend” Luther knew that Islamofacist terrorist Malcom X, so that means that the Kennedy was a terrorist sympathizer with secret ties to Osama Bin Laden back in the 60’s! Kennedy did WTC!!11eleventyone!

…Whew, excuse me, it’s just that he just ticks me off so when I hear that man called such a hero, when real heroes, like both Bush 41 and Bush 43, who pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps, and did great things for this nation, like helping to destroy Big Government by forcing to it deal with crippling national debt. Go W!

Still, I'm going to show that I'm a good person by saying I'll pray for his blackened soul, and I hope God does what I want Him to do when He judges this terrible sinner in a just and merciful manner by sending him to Hell.



*Sigh*… Obviously, the above is bitter, bitter sarcasm, but the terrible thing is that so many people seem to think that this intensely flawed yet idealistic man is somehow on par with Gobbels or Stalin. Yes, he used his connections to reduce his punishment in the Chappaquiddick Incident, but compare his actions, and the legacy that he and his brothers left, to that of any other American brahmins (i.e. Bush, Rockefeller, etc) and you'll find that Teddy, Jack and Bobbie were some of the most dedicated servants of American ideals that this country has ever encountered.

This man changed the nation for the better. He was deeply flawed, but he did more with his life then nearly any other senator I could name. He fought hard, lived long and left the world a better place then he found it. May we all be so lucky.